This is probably the subject where there is the most to gain. Nightmares spoil the lives of many people, effective approaches exist, and almost no one knows it. This article explains what they are, where they come from, what you can try, and when you should stop tinkering alone.
What a nightmare really is
The technical definition is narrower than one might think. A nightmare is a distressing dream that causes awakening. It is this criterion, and this alone, that distinguishes it from a bad dream, which is unpleasant but from which one does not wake up.
The distinction seems formal. It still matters, because it allows you to precisely name what is happening to you. Fundamentally, both are debilitating and the course of action is the same.
Do not confuse with night terror
A very frequent confusion, especially among parents. Night terror is not a nightmare, and everything separates them.
- The moment: night terror occurs at the beginning of the night, during deep non-REM sleep. Nightmares tend to occur at the end of the night, during REM sleep.
- The state: in a night terror, the person has their eyes open, seems inconsolable and does not recognize their loved ones. After a nightmare, awakening and contact are normal.
- The memory: none the next day for night terror, often very clear for nightmares.
Night terrors are common between three and eight years old, impressive for those around them, benign, and disappear spontaneously with age. The course of action is to secure without waking, and to wait for the episode to pass.
How many people are affected
Approximately three to eight percent of the population reportedly experiences nightmares to the point where their sleep quality is degraded. As an order of magnitude, one in twenty people. Women report them more often than men.
These figures are orders of magnitude, not exact measurements, and they vary according to studies. But the simple fact of knowing them is reassuring: if you experience them, you don't have a deranged brain or abnormal sensitivity. You are in a category that includes millions of people in France.
Where they come from
Two origins are distinguished. Reactive nightmares follow a life event, with post-traumatic stress being the extreme case, where the same scenario is replayed identically. And spontaneous nightmares, without an identifiable trigger.
Jean-Paul Tassin, neurobiologist and emeritus research director at Inserm, proposes a counter-intuitive hypothesis that is worth knowing. It would not be the nightmare that accelerates the heart, but the opposite. During REM sleep, neurovegetative regulation is suspended; a cardiac acceleration or sweating can occur, be interpreted by the brain as a danger signal, and trigger a scenario that gives meaning to this sensation. This is a research hypothesis, not an established fact, but it sheds light on many other cases: respiratory discomfort is often translated into dreams of drowning or suffocation.
Hence a useful point of attention, without any diagnosis on our part: repeated dreams of suffocation deserve to be discussed with a doctor, who will be able to evoke or rule out sleep apnea.
Finally, two aggravating factors. Stress, not surprisingly. And alcohol, in a more insidious way: it facilitates falling asleep, which explains the belief that it helps to sleep, but it suppresses REM sleep in the first part of the night then produces a rebound effect in the second part, with intense dream activity, agitated dreams and awakenings. We debunk this misconception and a few others in our sleep true-false.
Imagery Rehearsal Therapy, step by step
This is the best-established approach against recurrent nightmares, and it is among the most recommended by scientific sleep societies. Its principle is in three steps, and it is disconcertingly simple.
- Write down the recurring nightmare, in its entirety, as it unfolds.
- Rewrite the ending. A different, neutral or favorable outcome. The pursuer does not catch. Someone intervenes. The scene shifts elsewhere. It is not about denying the nightmare, but about offering it another way out.
- Mentally rehearse the new version, upon waking, regularly.
After a few weeks, the nightmare fades or transforms for many people. The limit of the method is clear and must be stated: it assumes a repetitive nightmare. If your nightmares are different each time, there is no single scenario to rewrite.
When the scenario changes every night: lucid dreaming
This is exactly where lucid dreaming takes over. Rather than rewriting a scenario, one learns to become lucid no matter what happens, and thus to modify any nightmare from within.
Two reasons to pay attention to it. First, people prone to recurrent nightmares are among those who most easily access lucidity: the repetitive nature of the scenario helps to recognize it. Second, studies, particularly those by German researcher Ursula Voss, suggest a benefit for people suffering from post-traumatic stress: regaining control of the scene, getting out of the victim position, reducing the fear of going to sleep.
The most reported action is not to fight the threatening figure, but to turn around and go towards it. Stéphane Carapel, a physiotherapist graduated from the University of Liège specializing in lucid dreaming, cites the case of a person long pursued by a monster, who finally faces and embraces it: the figure takes human form, and the nightmares cease. This is a clinical testimony, not a guaranteed protocol, and we present it as such: practitioners report, studies suggest, and we stop there. If escape scenes dominate for you, our article on nightmares explores this motif of pursuit, which is the one for which this approach is best documented.
In children
Children's nightmares are frequent and normal, especially after exposure to striking images. They do not signal anything alarming in themselves.
A simple approach is reported by practitioners: have the child draw. The drawing provides access to what they have understood or felt and cannot yet formulate in words. This is often better than an interrogation at breakfast.
When to see someone
Let's say it directly, because this is the most important part of this article. In case of nightmares related to trauma, or nightmares frequent enough to degrade your waking life, from your days to your apprehension of bedtime, you should consult a health professional. General practitioner, sleep center, psychologist. Neither this article, nor a notebook, nor an application replaces this support, and we claim nothing else.
In the meantime, what always helps: regular hours, a cool room, and a wind-down time before bed. Our evening ritual offers a simple framework, and the plants we grow on the farm accompany this moment with no other pretension than gentleness. If you want to follow the evolution of your nights over time, you can deposit your dreams and reread the series after a few weeks.
Content for informational purposes, not a substitute for medical advice.
